Thursday, October 3, 2013

Baggage Claim



Why did I see this you ask? I'll be honest. It was my first day off in MONTHS and I just missed seeing four movies in a row. And this is the only one that fit the time slot.

Yeah, there's nothing to really expect from this. You all know who she's going to fall in love with in the end as soon as he steps on screen. You know exactly how she's going to find out. There's even a terrible dream sequence that ends in a "it was all a dream" moment. It was bad. Real bad.

Get it? Her name is Montana Moore? Because she wants MORE! And, wait wait, one of her close guy friends is named William Wright?? Could that be because he's Mr. RIGHT?!?!?! ERMAGERD.

But there is a bit of...I guess not terrible things? Paula Patton is likable as ever. Even though she's kindof an idiot throughout the movie. But what do you really expect for a movie obviously made for girls night out? The girl does the one thing every woman wishes they could do and it's successful against all odds. That being said, I really don't believe any woman would want to go and re-connect with her exes the way she does. First of all, it's pretty creepy. But more importantly, most of her exes are pretty obviously terrible people. And just like any movie like this, you see who she's going to fall for and what's going to mess it all up. And yet interestingly, I was one of two people in the theatre. And the other person was a dude.

The soundtrack is definitely a point of hatred for me. Every song was obnoxiously obvious to the rest of the plot. A scene with her and her *cough* "friend" fooling around as "friends" has incredibly corny romance music playing over it. I mean, seriously movie. Can't you have a tiny bit of subtlety? You're a subtle as a Tyler Perry movie. I don't mean that as a compliment.

The rest of this movie is, well, what you'd expect. Lot's of guys that seem great at initial meetings. But the first one has a comedic result. Oh man, gurl you dodged a bullet! The second one ends with her demonstrating her strength as a woman. Mhmmmm girl you don't need THAT in your life! Then it moves onto a montage of men. You get the picture. The movie knows its audience. So I guess it has that going for it. But it definitely doesn't think highly of its audience. Its characters are so fake, so badly written stereotypes that I definitely felt like I was being talked down to. Even the last internal monologue is pretty damn condescending to the audience.

In fact, the funniest part of this movie was the very last interaction between Patton's best friends in the film, as they each discuss the date they're going to have that weekend. And that admittedly made me laugh pretty hard. But maybe my standards were just low enough to think that to be pretty hilarious.

Rank - 1/5

No comments:

Post a Comment